By Becky Payne
All I have ever wanted was to be a wife and mother, yet it has seemed that God was ignoring my desires! I have six nieces and nephews, and have been a dog mom to multiple dogs, but it is not the same! As fifty is rapidly approaching , I have finally accepted that I will never be a mom in the way I desire.
Though I have never birthed any children, God continues to show me...I am a mother. In my life, I have had many spiritual “children” who I have had the privilege of nurturing at various points in their life As a children/youth minister there were kids who came to me when they couldn’t talk with their parents...as a college professor and Sunday School teacher, I have had the privilege to teach many people...as a director of residents at a homeless shelter I was a mother figure guiding them through the effects of horrendous childhoods, loving them, and modeling for them how healthy relationships should look. In each of these roles, I have been called to mother.
My first Mother’s Day came several years ago when the minister told the congregation to look at your mom and tell her that you love her. Sitting next to me was a teenage boy who had been abandoned by his mom and had latched on to me. Leaning over, he put his head on my shoulder saying, “You’re my mom.” My heart broke that day...it broke wide open showing me the importance of my role as a surrogate mother.
In the Captivating Workbook the authors say: "Mothering someone is seeing them as they really are and calling them out to be that person. All women are called to mother. And all women are called to give birth. Women give birth to all kinds of things - to a book, to a church, or to a movement. Women give birth to ideas, to creative expressions to deeper walks with God, to deeper intimacy with Jesus. A woman is not less of a woman because she is not a wife or has not physically born a child. The heart and life of a woman is much more vast than that."
My heart is overflowing because of “my kids”. They have brought such joy into my life and I nearly missed it because of my desperation to have a family the way I wanted it. Many of you are desperately longing to be mothers for various reasons. My challenge for you is to see your calling to mother right where you are now. Who in your life needs love and nurture? Who could use a shoulder to cry on or a hug? God has placed people in your life that need you to lovingly guide them. I know it may not look like what you want, but I guarantee that you will be blessed beyond belief.
Isaiah 54:1 “Sing, barren woman, you who never bore a child; burst into song, shout for joy, you who were never in labor; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband,” says the Lord.”
Psalm 113:9 “He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the Lord.”